Relationships

Online dating vs. traditional dating: What’s changed?

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THE recent increase of online dating sites and rise in people using them poses the question: Is online dating taking over from traditional dating?

Dating sites and apps such as match.comTindergrindr and many more seem to be taking over traditions that many of us are used to.

Online dating and the idea of ‘social media love’ causes a conflict of opinions between many people.

Some welcome this change for the better seeing no problem with and thinking that it is a positive thing for society.

But this is contrasted by others who can not get past the idea of meeting someone online because they fear that it is impossible to really get to know someone that way.

Jack Franks, 22, from Durham met his partner Niamh Donnelly on Tinder. They have been together for more than a year.

He believes that with the technology we have these days online dating is taking over traditional dating.

“I think people might prefer first to meet online and then go on a date,” He said.

“There are very few people who meet in public and start a relationship that way.”

Although he met Niamh online he thinks this increase is a bad thing.

He said: “I don’t know how you can gauge what someone is like over the internet, how can you know what someone is like through text?”

“If you meet someone in person you instantly know because you get a little vibe.”

Like Jack, Natasha Ashby, 19, from Stockton, met her partner Ben Forth online.

She joined Tinder only a couple of months before meeting Ben.

At first she went on looking for a bit of fun after getting out of a long term relationship.

One thing led to another and nearly a year later the pair are still together.

Online dating opens the door for people to pretend to be someone there not.

It can be a way of making themselves look and sound better to get attention.

Natasha said: “One of my friends was getting on really well with a girl.”

“He thought she was extremely pretty – even model material.

But when he turned up to meet her she was nothing like he expected and had to carry on with the date until the end despite feeling no attraction for her.”

Although society is becoming more accepting of online dating many people still feel that they cannot truthfully share where they met there partners.

In the UK one in five relationships starts online but 81% of people lie about their age; height; figure and weight.

Daisy Best, Principle Lecturer of Psychology at Teesside University believes there could be a number of reasons people lie about their physical attributes.

“It is likely that the self-worth of the individual who has lied is relatively low if they feel unable to honestly disclose who they really are,” She said.

“It may be that life experiences have taught them that they will not be accepted if they are to present as themselves so believe that they need to present in another way in order to be accepted.

“They may wish to attract a certain type of person who they believe will only be attracted to them if they fit certain attributes.”

Daisy thinks the risk of meeting someone who  could be potentially lying is the individual’s choice.

She said: “Of course there are risks that people will be dishonest or have ulterior motives but these risks can be present online or offline.”

“Some people have found their soul mates through online dating and others have been significantly harmed.

“I think this reflects the continuum of relationships both online and beyond.

“We have to make our own choices in regard to whether online dating sites are okay or not, with awareness and respect for what we want from this encounter and the ability to recognise and value our own needs; feelings and safety throughout the process.”

What are your thoughts and views about on-line dating, would you take the risk?